12/13/2010

The Friends for Youth Holiday Ice Skating Party

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Imagine gliding on ice smooth as a windowpane, past a deep green fir tree, to a comfortable spot near a cozy brick fireplace.

This is not the idyllic scene of a lake in Northern Maine, nor of a January pond in Wisconsin. It is what you would have experienced at the Friends for Youth Holiday Ice Skating party, held Saturday, December 11th at the Winter Lodge in Palo Alto. Twenty-two Friendships attended, along with family, Friends and the entire Friends for Youth Staff.

Junior and Senior Friends brought their hats, scarves and mittens. They brought food for the potluck, including pastas, salads, dips, wraps, peppermint bark, sugar cookies, and hot cider. They each brought a present for the Friendship gift exchange. There were games and there was, of course, ice-skating on the impeccably zambonied rink. Everyone was very excited, and some people dressed festively. Junior Friend Josh wore a Santa Hat, and one mentor even wore snowpants for the event.

The Holiday Ice-Skating party is a tradition for Friends for Youth and the Friendships it serves. "It is always wonderful to see so many Friendships together at one event" said Mentoring Services Director Rebecca Duran.

"My favorite part was trying everyone's home made recipes!" Commented Program Coordinator Kristen Kimball.

For those Friendships who couldn't make it this year, remember the Holiday Party for next year! Both current and alumni Friendships are invited, and it is always a good time. Remember, you don't have to travel to the wintery states in order to ice-skate around a fir tree!

12/07/2010

Fun, Fashion, and Friendship: The 4th Annual Friends for Youth and Nordstrom Holiday Fashion Show

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The 4th Annual Friends for Youth and Nordstrom Holiday Fashion Show was held Saturday morning, December 4th at Nordstrom in Palo Alto.

The event included a silent auction, baskets full of Christmas fare, little quiches to nibble on, skewers of fruit, mimosas, music, and a Christmas tree decorated with Friendship-made ornaments. In total, 112 participants showed up to support youth at risk of not reaching their full potential in the Peninsula and South Bay!

The show was organized and coordinated by the Friends for Youth board, chaired by Rob Inouye. The emcee for the event was board member Petere Miner, chair of the Fashion Show committee.

After everyone was settled in their seats surrounding the fashion runway, the program began with a panel discussion featuring the two mentoring Friendships of Will + Aureliano and Mariya + Selena. The discussion was emceed by Friends for Youth Program Coordinator Kristen Kimball.

Bringing the crowd a good chuckle, Senior Friend Will told everyone, "My favorite experience is probably just us going out to eat, I would say." Will and Aureliano have been matched for nearly two years. "It's a great learning experience" added Aureliano, referring to his involvement in Friends for Youth. "[It] will help you progress in life and become a better person."

Junior Friend Selena had kind words for her Senior Friend Mariya. "I really like how Mariya is always there for me," she said. "She's someone I can always go to for when I need help."

After the Friendships panel, the Fashion Show got underway! There were teenage styles, Women's Fashion, Men's Fashion and occasional beauty tutorials along the way. The hit of the show was, once again, Male Model Charleston, who sported a wide array of classy, debonair outfits.

The show was fun, and the time had come for the raffle prizes to be drawn. One prize, a foursome of golf, was donated back to Friends for Youth by the winner and auctioned off, finally going for $200!

Fashion show committee chair Petere reminded attendees that Friends for Youth's Fashion Show has become a vital source of support for the organization's work, adding "it is heartening to see both the growth in participation over the Show's four-year existence, and the way the event has turned into a tradition for many."

Friends for Youth hopes to see you there next year, and wishes you happy holidays this year!

12/06/2010

Preventing Stress for Mentors and for Program Staff

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The holidays can become a stressful time for many people, as demands upon time, unfulfilled expectations from family, and a push to spend lots of money become overwhelming. Finding ways to prevent stress and burnout are crucial. Here are some suggestions:
  • For mentors, be thoughtful as you consider any gifts for your mentee. Your time is the greatest gift you can give - though we know that to a young person excited about the season of receiving presents, this may not be true! Think something small, inexpensive, and meaningful. One of the best gifts to give is an experience - ice skating, making ornaments, or attending a holiday concert or show together are all activities that continue to build your friendship while also being a little more special. If you get an actual present for your mentee, take into consideration what he or she may be receiving from family members and do not spend more - otherwise, parents or caregivers may end up feeling embarrassed, undermined, and/or resentful.
  • For program staff, remember to take some time for yourself. As workers in the helping field, we are asked to be givers and supporters year-round. Balance demands for the increased level of giving now with time for you that includes activities to help you relax and let go, like getting a massage or sitting quietly in a calm space. Prepare yourself for events by getting enough sleep, eating healthy food, and managing all the details well ahead of time. Accept gifts from mentors, mentees, and other supporters with an open heart - you definitely deserve it considering all the work you do!
  • Remember that this can be a stressful time for many of the mentees we work with, whether you're a volunteer mentor or program staff member. Expectations for having a loving family, receiving lavish and personal gifts, and being able to be generous to others may not be met for a family that is struggling financially, emotionally, and dynamically. The messages about gifts and spending holiday time together from the media and friends may not be realistic for many, and this impact can be greater for children and youth. Disappointment and hurt are all possible, no matter what situation a family is currently in. Stay positive and understanding if a mentee is having a hard time during the next few weeks and remind them of their own strengths and future - change is possible!
If you're a professional helper, consider attending the Helper Self-Care: Preventing Burnout, Compassion Fatigue, and Vicarious Traumatization workshop being offered at our upcoming 12th annual youth mentoring conference, Share What You Know: Collaboration and Networking in Youth Mentoring in January. You'll learn more tips on how to keep effective boundaries, set realistic expectations, and practice ways to take care of yourself as you manage the daily stress involved with working with a challenging population.

12/01/2010

Stress Management Workshop at Friends for Youth

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On the evening of November 18th, Friends for Youth held a Life Skills workshop in Stress Management at its offices, lead by Youth and Family Enrichment Services presenter S. B. Five Friendships attended, along with staff members Rebecca Duran and Jonathan Cowgill.


Friendships talked to each other about how their weeks were going and tried to identify major stressors and methods of coping with that stress. After everyone shared their particular gripes for the week, S. B. spoke about the dangers of allowing stress to build up and get out of hand. Junior Friends came up with a definition for depression, and S. B. talked about what to do if yourself or a friend is exhibiting signs of depression.


Finally, S. B. spoke about the dangers of suicide (death), how to prevent it (talk about it), how to seek help (call the Crisis Hotline at 650-579-0350) and when to report it (always: a mad friend is better than a dead friend).


Overall, the event was informative and engaging. Everybody participated, everybody learned something, and everybody ate pizza!

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